Wednesday, December 12, 2007


So some asshole with a heart the size of a ham (prolly) decided to rob a Dunkin' Donuts up in Elmwood Park, NJ.

15 minutes to Judge Wapner.....

Now he didn't have a weapon but he did jump over the counter and started taking $.

Mr. Dunkin' Donuts Worker wasn't having none of it, though.

According to the police, Mr. Dunkin' Donuts Worker grabbed the man's wrists while hitting him with the mug, which is used to hold tips.

10 minutes to Judge Wapner....

So you're saying, "Big fucking whoopie deal," yes?


6 minutes to Judge Wapner...

Mr. Dunkin' Donuts Worker admits he was less worried about the stolen cash than how he might look on the video-sharing site YouTube.

"What was going through my mind at that point was that the security tape is either going to show me run away and hide in the office or whack this guy in the head, so I just grabbed the cup and clocked the guy pretty hard."

3 minutes to Judge Wapner....

That's right, baby.

Mr. Dunkin' Donuts Worker IMMEDIATELY thought of the surveillance tape that was running in the store.

And how he was gonna look GOOD when it got posted on YouTube.

1 minute to Judge Wapner...

Oh yeah, one more thing.

Mr. Dunkin' Donuts Workers' name?

Time for Judge Wapner!


© 2007 HillCountryGal

Note: "Sheep Shagging" by my fave Scotsman, Billy Connelly

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